From Scott Vanatter with permission-Copyright- Indira
Just Following Orders
The general handed Marcellus the white signal flag. “Fly it from that far tree. The cavalry must retreat. We are being routed.”
Orders were everything. Marcellus ran, keeping low, but enemy archers spotted him. He climbed, arrows thunking against the trunk. A pain in his leg, then his shoulder. Then his back.
Must complete the order. Darkness finally swallowed his sight and he slumped, the flag suspended below him.
* * *
“The signal! What color is it?”
“White? No . . . it’s red!”
“A charge? Is he insane?”
“We must follow orders.”
Later, they called the charge that won the day the Marcellus Charge.
The Green-Walled Tower 
April 3rd, 2013 at 7:04 pm
I love that story
April 3rd, 2013 at 10:18 pm
🙂
April 3rd, 2013 at 7:10 pm
I love your stories.
April 3rd, 2013 at 10:18 pm
Thank you! 🙂 Glad you like it.
April 3rd, 2013 at 7:22 pm
Dear David,
There’s following orders and then there’s following orders. Wonderfully told story of bravery. Well done.
shalom,
Rochelle
April 6th, 2013 at 11:21 pm
There’s definitely an up and down side to following orders blindly, but I guess in this case it worked out, although at a high price for Marcellus.
April 3rd, 2013 at 7:27 pm
really different and an effective story-telling
April 3rd, 2013 at 7:31 pm
Haha… Marcellus did real good, after all…! 😉
April 3rd, 2013 at 7:41 pm
You caught that just right! Very good!
April 3rd, 2013 at 7:51 pm
Nicely done !
April 3rd, 2013 at 8:14 pm
So sad in the end, his bravery was his death. I am astounded how much I read and read-into your story with so few words – extremely well written David.
April 3rd, 2013 at 8:34 pm
Well crafted tale, to the point.
April 3rd, 2013 at 8:59 pm
That’s a brilliant take on the prompt! Well done.
April 3rd, 2013 at 9:55 pm
Marcellus will be the last to know that he succeeded
excellent take on the prompt
April 3rd, 2013 at 9:58 pm
Thank you. Yeah, he will never know how much he succeeded.
April 3rd, 2013 at 10:12 pm
Great story David!
April 3rd, 2013 at 10:20 pm
Thanks, man!
April 3rd, 2013 at 10:29 pm
I assume he got a posthumous knighthood
April 3rd, 2013 at 10:30 pm
Hopefully, if there was any justice, although he did inadvertently show that the general’s original orders were wrong. 🙂
April 3rd, 2013 at 10:32 pm
Very clever David, and well told as usual. 🙂
April 3rd, 2013 at 11:07 pm
Hi David
Another great story, I just love your take on the prompt this week.
Very cleverly done
Dee
April 3rd, 2013 at 11:59 pm
Good story, David. Don’t you wish it was that simple still with war and battles, when one was ready to retreat or surrender with a white flag. Don’t think we will see North Korea or Iran or even Syria doing that, will we? Times are a changing, ever so fast.
April 4th, 2013 at 9:45 am
The world has gotten a lot more complicated, to be sure.
April 4th, 2013 at 12:46 am
Unexpected and wonderful, David. Filled with twists.
janet
April 4th, 2013 at 3:19 am
I didn’t know “red” meant charge! Great, unexpected story on the prompt, David!
April 6th, 2013 at 11:18 pm
I’m not sure if it ever did in history, but in this story world it does. 🙂
April 4th, 2013 at 3:37 am
My jaw dropped again the second time I read this. Your stories have a habit of leaving me speechless!
April 6th, 2013 at 11:17 pm
Thank you so much!
April 4th, 2013 at 5:46 am
A mini charge of the light brigade! Nicely done.
April 4th, 2013 at 6:21 am
Hi David – Had no idea “red” meant – Charge!! Had to go back and read it again. What a diff. it made. Amazing how instructive some sh. stories can be. Nice work.
April 6th, 2013 at 11:13 pm
I’m not sure what sorts of flag signals historical armies used, but in this world at least, for the purposes of the story, red means charge. 🙂
April 4th, 2013 at 8:16 am
Poor Marcellus he followed the orders so well. Too bad the white flag was no longer white. A enjoyable read.
April 4th, 2013 at 1:34 pm
This is great. A quality piece, I enjoyed reading.
April 4th, 2013 at 4:20 pm
horrible! sad and fantastic piece of story.
April 5th, 2013 at 3:26 am
Brilliantly crafted – I love the white flag turning red.
April 5th, 2013 at 4:41 am
Brilliant David, told like a master.
April 6th, 2013 at 11:11 pm
Thank you, Boomie. 🙂
April 5th, 2013 at 10:25 am
This photo made me think of war too, which I thought was strange because it’s such a peaceful looking photo. Your story really puts the reader in the moment and makes me think how senseless it all is.
April 6th, 2013 at 11:11 pm
I’m not sure what made me first think of war with this. I had another idea in mind first, but it didn’t work well in such a short format. Maybe because the tree is so rugged and scarred, as if it’s a survivor.
April 5th, 2013 at 2:22 pm
Great story. At least the leaders gave him credit for it! Usually after accidents of history those in charge say “yeah, we meant to do that.”
April 5th, 2013 at 4:23 pm
Realistically, that’s probably the case, that the credit would go to the cavalry commander. But the good thing about fiction is we get to create our own reality. 🙂
April 5th, 2013 at 10:35 pm
What a turnaround. I admit, it took me several seconds to realize how the flag turned from white to red. Marcellus, your death inspired!
April 6th, 2013 at 11:09 pm
I found that this was a little more subtle than some I write. 100 words doesn’t leave a lot of room for spelling things out and I find that with some people’s stories I have to read them several times to understand exactly what they’re going for.
April 5th, 2013 at 10:43 pm
Very well done and inspirational story. Thanks!
April 6th, 2013 at 11:09 pm
No, thank you. 🙂
April 5th, 2013 at 11:59 pm
A victory by miscommunication.. Loved the irony in this..
April 6th, 2013 at 12:02 am
Yeah, me too. 🙂
April 6th, 2013 at 12:04 am
Your depiction of Marcellus was flawless. I was in the tree with him. Perfect. The soldiers’ discussion… I love the concept and like the words, but I think it might have worked better to divide the dialogue more to give a greater sense of urgency.
“The signal!”
“Is it white?”
“Red!”Join our live chat with Melanie Warner at 1 p.m. ET on Wednesday, March 27. See below for details.
“He’s insane!” (Don’t make it a question… I’m sure the soldier had no doubt!)
“We follow orders!” (Leave off the must… No time for extra words when preparing to charge).
For me, the difference between the writing in the two parts was a bit too pronounced. It was almost as if the beginning ran in elegant slow motion, and then you wrapped it up too quickly at the end. (I know, 100 words…) I wonder if it might read more fluidly if that last sentence went more like, “So began the charge that won the war, which history books would one day call The Marcellus Charge.”
I am so sorry if I’m making too many suggestions. I genuinely love your story!
April 6th, 2013 at 12:08 am
P.S. I have no idea why I invited everyone to a live chat with Melanie Warner. My iPhone is sending subliminal messages. (There’s an idea for a future story…) 🙂
April 6th, 2013 at 12:16 am
🙂 All good, and good point about separating the dialogue. Do you want me to delete the additional part of your comment? Either way…
April 6th, 2013 at 12:27 am
Oh, I don’t care. I just thought it was odd of Melanie to crash the party… 🙂
April 6th, 2013 at 2:17 am
Incredibly vivid storytelling! The suspense was perfectly built. Wonderful interpretation of the photo prompt, and a story told masterfully.
April 6th, 2013 at 11:06 pm
That’s high praise; thank you so much.
April 6th, 2013 at 4:28 am
Great story with unique plot. Very nice.
April 6th, 2013 at 11:05 pm
Thanks. 🙂
April 6th, 2013 at 9:20 am
You David Can I curse? Cause that was one kick a– motha f-ing good story. Nice job with the prompt! Loved it!
Tom
April 6th, 2013 at 10:53 pm
Hey, as long as you’re cursing in a compliment, it’s all good. 🙂 I’m happy with how it turned out too.
April 6th, 2013 at 9:40 am
Wow, awesome job. You handled the arrow-after-arrow thing perfectly, and then the switch to the perspective farther back was great. Enjoyed it!
April 6th, 2013 at 10:53 pm
Thanks! Glad you liked it. 🙂
April 7th, 2013 at 3:38 am
There is always too much blood. Can we hope that the side of justice won? A battle does not end the war. Funny, just to be sure there wasn’t some important battle of history I missed, I looked up Marcellus Charge
and got hooked up to a football player.
Thanks for your visit.
April 7th, 2013 at 12:29 pm
I’m afraid to say it’s pure fiction. 🙂 Although I’d like to think it was a significant battle, most battles and wars don’t solve much and just cause a lot of destruction, it seems.
April 7th, 2013 at 9:11 am
good story — I kept expecting it to be Picket’s charge at Gettysburgh!
April 7th, 2013 at 11:07 am
I liked this!
April 7th, 2013 at 8:31 pm
This is awesome David. I like it for a longer short story. There is such emotion, heroism and disbelief, but marcellus is the hero in the end.
April 7th, 2013 at 9:46 pm
Thank you. I find that 100-word stories are great as an exercise in conciseness, but there are times when I would love to expand on it. Perhaps I will with this one sometime.
April 8th, 2013 at 8:20 pm
Excellent story, David. I was right there in the action.
April 10th, 2013 at 7:54 pm
This is so good. You have packed so much into those 100 words. And although not mentioned the smells, emotions and sounds of the battle come through.
April 10th, 2013 at 10:16 pm
Thank you. 🙂 I appreciate your comments.