copyright Roger Bultot
It Could’ve Been Worse
“It could’ve been worse,” I said.
Her eyes machine-gunned daggers at me. “Worse? I can’t walk around with a chipped fingernail.”
A bolt of lightning shot out of the blue sky, exploding the front-yard maple.
“My car!” she screamed, as we picked ourselves off the road. “It’s only six months old.”
“At least you weren’t in it. It could’ve been worse.”
More lightning bolts shot down, hitting nearby houses, and the sky darkened with the shapes of hundreds of alien craft.
“It could be—”
She punched me. It could have been worse; at least she went for the face.
The Green-Walled Tower 
August 14th, 2013 at 9:05 pm
Dear David,
I love that I can count on reading a good story when I click on your icon. This one has me laughing to beat the band and I’ll probably think of you every time I hear that phrase from now on. Love it.
Aloha,
Doug
P.S. And don’t tell me it could have been worse….
August 14th, 2013 at 10:06 pm
Thanks, Doug. I always appreciate your comments. I tend to be an incorrigible optimist myself. It can annoy my wife, but…(I won’t say the line. 🙂 )
August 14th, 2013 at 9:19 pm
Gorgeous. True too – it always CAN be worse (thus the line – it could have been worse, and then it was).
August 14th, 2013 at 10:53 pm
I have always loved the line “It could be worse” because it is no comfort to anyone and almost seems to be tempting fate. But people still say it. 🙂
August 14th, 2013 at 9:35 pm
I think if I spent time with anyone this optimistic, I’d punch them in the face too, even before the alien invasion.
August 14th, 2013 at 10:55 pm
🙂 Anyone that one-sided can grate on the nerves. Almost as bad as their pessimistic counterpart, always whining that it could be better.
August 14th, 2013 at 10:01 pm
The guy deserved all he got. And at least he got to walk away, hopefully. Nice one.
August 14th, 2013 at 10:56 pm
Yeah, who knows how it will ultimately end. In 100 words, he got hit in the face and there is an alien invasion. He could be dead by 150 words.
August 15th, 2013 at 12:33 am
Oh no! Not aliens! Could it have been any worse? I think not, but I appreciate your character’s optimist. Great story, David.
August 17th, 2013 at 2:57 pm
I tried to think of the worst thing possible. It might depend on what kind of aliens they were, although if they start off by destroying cars and houses, it’s not a good sign. 🙂
August 15th, 2013 at 1:19 am
LOL! A beautifully conceived humorous concept. And you’ll excuse me if I point out that: It could have been worse!
August 17th, 2013 at 2:57 pm
🙂 Thanks.
August 15th, 2013 at 2:49 am
This has a Laverne and Shirley feel / not sure what they would do with aliens – probably run!!!!!
August 15th, 2013 at 2:53 am
Gave me a laugh. Thanks!
August 15th, 2013 at 3:26 am
haha this is great ^^ i swear i would’ve punched him in the face too 🙂 on second thought, i think i’ll just hand him over to the aliens and maybe his optimism would drive them away ^^
August 15th, 2013 at 3:29 am
This was wonderful, David. I especially liked the use of repetition for effect.
August 15th, 2013 at 4:54 am
Certainly the sort of guy who could very easily annoy me, although I might not go as far as punching him in the face.
August 15th, 2013 at 5:11 am
Loved the last line, I laughed out loud 🙂
August 15th, 2013 at 6:02 am
It could’ve been worse, and then it was!!!
August 15th, 2013 at 7:24 am
LOL, it definitely COULD be worse…wait and see what those aliens want 😉
August 15th, 2013 at 7:41 am
Very funny! The repetition and build-up was great, and the “punch” line was perfect 🙂
August 15th, 2013 at 8:12 am
Great story David, very funny. I loved the ever worsening events and the ‘punch’ line. 🙂
August 15th, 2013 at 8:58 am
I read it a couple of times. I like the repeated theme.
August 15th, 2013 at 9:02 am
Dear David,
It could’ve been worse. I could’ve skipped your story. Nah…never! At least she went for the face. LOL (At least I wasn’t eating or drinking when I read that line.
Good one!
Shalom,
Rochelle
August 15th, 2013 at 10:56 am
My best friend and my wife both accuse me of saying something funny right when they’re drinking something, so I’m glad it doesn’t extend over the Internet as well. 🙂 Glad you liked it. I’m sure I could have written it worse.
August 15th, 2013 at 6:28 pm
And then my leg fell off.
August 15th, 2013 at 6:28 pm
And then my leg fell off.
August 15th, 2013 at 8:33 pm
I was wondering how the lightning was coming from the blue sky, then those pesky aliens showed up.
August 16th, 2013 at 1:07 am
Hi David,
A good downward spiraling story. From a chipped nail to an alien invasion in 100 words. Quite a breadth of imagination. Ron
August 16th, 2013 at 4:10 pm
good for her that she shut him up 🙂
August 16th, 2013 at 8:06 pm
Wait until we hear what he has to say when he finds himself the last man on an Earth newly populated by curious aliens–the punch in the face will pale.
August 16th, 2013 at 8:26 pm
Hmm, will anything faze his optimism? If he’s extreme about it, then being dead is probably the worst thing that could happen and then he’s not alive to know it. I’m sure this story could go downhill quickly with a few more paragraphs. 🙂
August 17th, 2013 at 2:30 am
Hysterical David! An optimist gets his comeuppance!
August 17th, 2013 at 2:44 am
Gotta laugh when the end of the world is at hand and a chipped fingernail ruins your day!
August 17th, 2013 at 4:44 am
I wonder what’s worse than an alien invasion… a pity she hit himg
August 17th, 2013 at 12:58 pm
Their day went from bad to worse in a hurry. Well, hers did, anyway. I don’t know if he’s ever had a bad day.
August 17th, 2013 at 5:51 pm
Dear David
This could be a scene from a modern version of ‘Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf’
Well written, loved it
Dee
August 18th, 2013 at 2:33 am
My darling, I like this story a lot. But could you have made a lightning bolt hit her. 🙂 Very well told.
Love, Renee
August 18th, 2013 at 1:29 pm
Maybe if she got blasted into oblivion in front of him, that might have quelled his optimism a bit (or he could have said, “could have been worse: could have been me”) 🙂
August 19th, 2013 at 2:32 am
Yes, could have been might have made shut her yapper. Giggle.
August 19th, 2013 at 12:01 am
LOL. Maybe with the next blast she’ll disappear and it’ll only get better.
August 20th, 2013 at 10:15 pm
At least is wasn’t a knee to the groin–I hate when that happens!
I love a nice tale with great humor. Well done, David.
August 21st, 2013 at 1:32 am
I like that you’ve taken a phrase we often use when some disaster occurs and fashioned a story from it. I’ll have to try that device myself. And the story’s funny. You characterised extraordinarly well in only 100 words too as those two are opposites, aren’t they? I bet the husband is sitting on another planet now, admiring his intact ‘block and tackle’ and thinking that it could’ve been worse.
August 21st, 2013 at 11:04 pm
It is pretty funny what that phrase implies. In one way, it’s obviously true, but really, does that make the present situation any better?
August 22nd, 2013 at 6:26 am
Yes, if you consider that everything is about perception? All our decisions about how we deal with a situation depend on how we perceive said situation – and on many other things. 🙂
August 21st, 2013 at 8:18 am
I’m sorry but I have to agree. It could have been worse.