Hi everyone, did you think I would miss Friday Fictioneers this week? I’m over 24 hours late from when I usually post this, but I wasn’t feeling inspired. The problem with doing these every week for so long is that I don’t want to write just any story and if I don’t get an idea I really like, I just keeping thinking and thinking. I don’t know if this is exactly a good story, but it’s unapologetically bizarre, and that’s okay in my books.
copyright Erin Leary
Foggy Bottom Brain Surgery
Dr. Singh was sweating like . . . there was no better analogy than what he was at that moment: a doctor performing brain surgery on the king of the Bhligli, whose cognitive organ was in their buttocks. The Blighli never thought sitting down.
The tumor was an active thing, dodging the scalpel and hiding in the forest of alien ganglia.
“More suction, the whole thing is filling up with fog.”
Slurp. A greenish appendage disappeared up the vacuum tube. The nurse cringed under his wrathful look. “Do you think that was important?”
“For the sake of the human race, I hope not.”
The Green-Walled Tower 
May 22nd, 2014 at 11:35 pm
Haha! Love this. He might have vacuumed the Blighli’s best thought to date. Though Blighlis don’t think sitting down, often my best thoughts come out while I’m sitting. 😉 That was truly funny and I enjoyed it a lot.
May 23rd, 2014 at 11:22 am
I was going to add another scene where they broke it to the others and found out it was the king’s leadership center so he could never lead again, but it was ok since they had hundreds of royals lined up to take his place. But I didn’t have room. It’s almost better this way, since the reader can speculate over what it was, if anything.
May 23rd, 2014 at 12:25 am
Fantastic story! Thoroughly enjoyed it 🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 11:20 am
Thank you. I’m glad. 🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 12:56 am
🙂 Poor Dr Singh excising a neural condylomata (if such a thing exists)
Loved the quirky idea. 🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 11:20 am
I think it can exist if you want it to 🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 2:28 pm
🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 2:38 am
Dave, we are both late to the party this week… but better late than… Clever, and dynamic. This sci-fi story was very amusing! But then, I’m partial to neurosurgeons. 😉
May 23rd, 2014 at 11:19 am
Thank you. I’ll read your story when I get home. For some reason, your blog is one of the only ones that is blocked at my workplace. I don’t know what you have on there, but … 🙂
May 24th, 2014 at 1:03 am
If I told you, I’d have to kill you… 😉
May 23rd, 2014 at 2:47 am
In my book, you are always early! I’m having trouble this week, so I’m thinking and thinking. This is one of your most bizarre, David. I love it!
May 23rd, 2014 at 11:16 am
Thanks Amy. Take your time! I’ll read it whenever it’s out.
May 23rd, 2014 at 4:32 am
This is funny and a little gross. I feel the same way if I don’t get inspired I tend to not submit that week. That’s why I’m not always participating.
May 23rd, 2014 at 11:16 am
Sometimes a story jumps out at me and I write it in 10 minutes. Other times…not so much. Thanks for your comment.
May 23rd, 2014 at 4:34 am
Bizarre and wonderful. 😀
It was so different. 🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 11:15 am
Thank. It is definitely that. 🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 5:02 am
Good grief! That was like M.A.S.H. meets the X-Files. Hilarious and yes, a little gross.
May 23rd, 2014 at 11:15 am
That’s a good way to describe it. We could call it X.A.S.H.
May 23rd, 2014 at 6:30 am
Completely mad and well worth the wait!
May 23rd, 2014 at 11:14 am
Glad to hear. 🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 9:10 am
Hahahaha! Dave, you keep right on thinking. That was a good one! 🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 11:13 am
Thanks. 🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 9:54 am
LOL – good location for one’s brains – reminds me of some people I know 🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 11:13 am
That’s very true. Some people talk out of them too. 🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 1:44 pm
Well that was sooooo different that I have just one word for it it’s just plain “Davidy” ! 😀
May 23rd, 2014 at 2:46 pm
I almost heard that green thing being vacuumed away. You’re really far out this week David. 🙂
May 23rd, 2014 at 7:41 pm
Bizarre is apt. Hope the Bhligli are a forgiving species.
May 23rd, 2014 at 7:49 pm
Dear David,
As always your story was worth the wait. I relate as someone who won’t just post the first thing that pops into mind for the sake of time. Did that make sense?
At any rate, this was out of this world. 😉 I think I know a few whose brains reside in their tushes. Clever clever clever.
Shalom,
Rochelle
May 24th, 2014 at 1:15 am
a bottom brain.. haha! i love it, David. 🙂
May 24th, 2014 at 1:30 am
I think I know a few more people who have brains in the same place as the King of the Bhligli – but green?? Loved this David, up to your usual standard. I was late posting too, but seems par for the course for me of late.
May 24th, 2014 at 1:48 am
Very funny. The descriptions of the fog swirling around the ganglia are wonderful.
I’m glad you waited to write and post this rather than skipping. I spend more time thinking about the prompts and waiting for the stories to come than writing them. Just a minor niggle – would ‘his buttocks’ read better than ‘their buttocks’ in the first sentence? We know from the second one that the Blighli can’t think and sit, poor things.
May 24th, 2014 at 2:26 am
Oops…That doesn’t sound good. I like how you used the prompt to take you some place completely unexpected!
May 24th, 2014 at 2:52 am
Another twisted bit of magic 😉
May 24th, 2014 at 2:55 am
David, this gives a whole new twist to “Sit down and think about it” and similar sayings. No matter if it took a bit longer, this was worth the wait (although perhaps not to the king and the surgeon.) I just have one quibble and it’s grammatical: “whose cognitive organ was in their buttocks” should be “organs were” since the rest is plural.”
janet
May 24th, 2014 at 5:11 am
I wonder if there’s aVogon anal-logy here?… Maybe it was the worst poem ever written .. earth is saved… 🙂
May 24th, 2014 at 6:16 am
Truly strange. Love it.
May 24th, 2014 at 6:32 pm
Dear David, Wait until Blighli gets Dr. Singh’s bill for the surgery. That’ll kill him if nothing else does. Good story – really well done!
May 24th, 2014 at 6:47 pm
Well that was certainly an alien take on the prompt! Sure hope that creatures survives this surgery.
May 25th, 2014 at 5:53 am
Ooh, yes, desperately bizarre this week, David, but I thoroughly enjoyed it.
As to when the FF flash gets posted, I appreciate writers who take their time to come up with a good idea rather than posting whatever dreck first comes to mind. I came in late this week and last, but I felt good about the content of both stories. It isn’t about posting early in order to get the most hits. It’s about honing our personal skills as authors. (There’s a reason I’ve followed you but not the bulk of others that play along.)
All my best,
Marie Gail
May 25th, 2014 at 7:58 am
You have countless comments from a hoard of fans…you really our the Elvis of kinky noir. That said…the whole idea of vacuuming has taken on all new meaning. Now when I dig behind those sofa cushions I will wonder if its B has just been removed 🙂
May 25th, 2014 at 9:05 am
I’m glad you waited and thought things through, Very funny and fun – salted with a tad bit of creepy.
May 25th, 2014 at 9:15 am
No one does unapologetically bizarre better! 😉
May 26th, 2014 at 1:01 pm
this is over the top! 🙂
May 26th, 2014 at 4:18 pm
David, That story was hilarious. XD Creative, even wild, use of the prompt. You certainly used your brain. I think their suction device is set on “suck to kill.” 🙂 Well done. —Susan
May 26th, 2014 at 5:23 pm
Really enjoyed that last line. Great stuff as always.
May 26th, 2014 at 8:16 pm
Dear David,
What’s in the air out there? Loved your lunatic take on the prompt. Well written and bizarre.
Aloha,
Doug
May 27th, 2014 at 1:58 am
Bizarre is an understatement David!! But enjoyably so 😀
May 27th, 2014 at 5:46 pm
you kept your promise by starving your readers for more… no complaints because I too am quite elusive these days 🙂
May 27th, 2014 at 9:59 pm
The king of the Bhligli should have his own TV series! A weird and wonderful story, with some very human reactions from the medical staff.
May 28th, 2014 at 1:43 pm
Where are you?
May 28th, 2014 at 10:24 pm
I’m around. I’ve been quite busy, but I’m sorry for not being on the blog very much lately.
May 30th, 2014 at 12:34 pm
well, as you have told me already how stuck up you are in world outside internet it was not a surprise.
handle things priority wise but dong ignore health 🙂
May 30th, 2014 at 2:26 pm
I’m trying to keep everything balanced. My knee is getting better slowly.
June 18th, 2014 at 6:09 pm
dont push it.