A Ghost of a Chance of Success
Honestly, I only tried it because my wife said I couldn’t do it.
She gets me to do all kinds of things that way. “I’ll bet you don’t have the guts to marry me,” she said one indolent afternoon 27 years ago, when the summer crickets were in full concert.
I sure showed her.
The challenges started with the mundane: “Bah, you couldn’t mow the lawn if you tried.”
You’d think I’d learn but I had to show her who was boss. Soon I was doing most of the housework while she watched TV and occasionally called out her disbelief in my ability to do various small tasks that I had forgotten.
Eventually, her challenges crossed over into more exotic realms but I never backed down for a second. I spent most of 2013 trying to build a time machine but eventually just built a very small museum and declared victory.
For this latest challenge, I’ve assembled all the things I might need: a large glass bottle, a tombstone, a Bible, a copy of the Necronomicon (just in case) and a liter of ectoplasm.
Now how on Earth am I going to make a ghost ship in a bottle?
January 11th, 2015 at 9:44 pm
This was great! You write the kind of short stories I wish I could write but can’t (or at least I haven’t been successful).
I hope you’re putting them all (or a lot of them) together in a book.
January 11th, 2015 at 10:10 pm
Wow, thanks. That’s high praise from the author of The Literary Girlfriend. I am working on things to publish, although for a compilation I’d have to add something new since it’s all available free here. 🙂
January 11th, 2015 at 10:05 pm
Haha! I don’t know if he is “stupid” or his wife is “brilliant.” 😀 Great story!
January 11th, 2015 at 10:24 pm
A little of both, I think. 🙂 I have this alter-ego I write from occasionally who is quite oblivious. It’s fun.
January 11th, 2015 at 10:58 pm
Sounds like fun. You have a fun-loving alter ego. 😀
January 12th, 2015 at 12:01 am
Oh, ghost ship in a bottle… 🙂
You can’t build a time machine, even on a dare!
January 12th, 2015 at 12:20 am
Ask blackbeard or mumbly (the canine agent of animation world) how they captured the ships in bottles, then just capture a ghost/haunted ship if you find one.
January 12th, 2015 at 6:02 am
Ha ha. Just plug up the bottle and tell her the ship is invisible. Poor David, bet you can’t cook me a five course gourmet meal. I will send you my address by P.Message lol
January 12th, 2015 at 12:37 pm
Oh-ho, the wife is brilliant and the husband has to be that streak of genius only the truly oblivious can master.
January 14th, 2015 at 10:26 pm
Yep, they’re quite a pair. I guess that’s what marriage is all about (?) 🙂
January 12th, 2015 at 2:23 pm
He can’t win them all, I don’t think. Especially this one.
January 14th, 2015 at 10:24 pm
Nope, I don’t think so. But you gotta admire his attitude (maybe) 🙂
January 13th, 2015 at 11:38 pm
Its good to be married to a woman that challenges you l)
January 14th, 2015 at 10:21 pm
That’s one way of looking at it. 🙂
January 15th, 2015 at 5:31 am
That’s brilliant. I laughed out loud when I read that. So I called my daughter in and read it to her. She loved it. Thought it was brilliant.
January 15th, 2015 at 6:41 pm
That’s great, Al. Thank you so much. You made my night. 🙂
January 16th, 2015 at 1:17 pm
Gads! The dreaded, infamous Necronomicon. Lovecraft would be proud. This is great. I think my wife knows the same trick.
January 16th, 2015 at 9:28 pm
My wife tried it immediately after reading the story. Nope, it didn’t work. 🙂 And yes, I like a good shout-out to Lovecraft every now and then.
January 18th, 2015 at 2:55 am
Good story. Forget the ghost ship, where the heck did he get ectoplasm? His wife has a good thing going there. If he hasn’t caught on in all those years, she can feel secure. Well done. 🙂 — Suzanne