Category Archives: Uncategorized

February 23, 2017

Pay to Play Pedagogy

I’m back again. Don’t worry, I haven’t died or given up writing. On the contrary, I’ve been hard at work on several novels I’ve been writing since last fall. They’re almost done, and I’m hoping to get back to writing for the blog more regularly.

Pay to Play Pedagogy

Exams at BDV For-Profit High School were about to begin. Jamie donned his VR goggles. The scene changed to a snowy forest.

A Viking charged him, ax raised, shouting “Imperative!”

“Die!” Jamie screamed and stabbed it.

Another ran from his right. “Future!”

“I will destroy you!” The Viking died like the first.

An arrow whistled from the darkness. As he died, Jamie saw the words Past Perfect written on the shaft. He had had problems with that before.

Please pay $5.00 or get an F. Jamie hit pay. He only had $30 for the exam. He needed to do better.

31 Comments | tags: exam, fiction, for-profit, Friday Fictioneers, funny, grammar, high school, science-fiction, virtual reality | posted in Friday Fictioneers, Uncategorized

July 31, 2016

Jabberwocky by UIU

By David Stewart

It is summer at the moment, and if you work at a university, you know that summer is a fairly quiet time. So, I decided to have some fun at work. My favorite poem has for years been Jabberwocky, by Lewis Carroll. What I did was divide the poem up into small sections and I went around campus with a video camera and recorded staff, faculty and students saying the parts, then put them all together.

4 Comments | tags: fantasy, Intensive English Program, Jabberwocky, Lewis Carroll, mashup, outside the tower, UIU, Upper Iowa, Upper Iowa University, video, Youtube | posted in Uncategorized

July 11, 2016

8 Tips When Applying for a Job

By David Stewart

I hate applying for jobs. You find one that you are decently qualified for, go through half an hour of filling out their application form, tweaking your cover letter and resume, checking all the other documents they want, sending it off and then . . . very often, nothing at all, until much later when you receive a form rejection letter from the HR department.

Source

That, unfortunately is the way of things. All places receive way more applications that they can even give interviews to, but I always wondered what they were looking for. What could I do to get an edge?

Well, now I know a little more since I am on the other side of things. I am now in the position of hiring people and that has taught me a lot about the whole process. Of course, I can only speak for myself, and there is unfortunately no perfect formula for getting a job: if someone else is more qualified, they will probably get the position. However, here are 8 things that I can suggest that will help you put your best foot forward. I won’t include proofreading your cover letter and resume because I really hope you do that anyway.

Source

1. Include everything in the job description

The whole point of your cover letter and resume is to get an interview. Remember that the people going over your application do not know a single thing about you besides what you put on those few pieces of paper. Your resume is just a list of what you have done and can’t really change much. However, the cover letter is a chance to show how that matches the job you’re applying for. Mention every single thing in the job description and why you can do it. If you don’t have direct experience, talk about transferable skills you have learned at other jobs. If the job asks for someone who is proficient at email, mention that you are. Don’t just assume they know you are, just because everyone should be. They probably have a checklist to make sure you have all the qualifications and you want them to be able to check all the boxes for you, not have a question mark next to some.

2. Be very specific on the cover letter, but don’t rewrite your resume

There is a very high probability that the people going over your application are going through a ton of them and that after a while, they all tend to blend together except for the very good and the very bad ones. Maybe it’s Friday afternoon and they’ve already picked out some to interview. Yours is the last one before they can go home. That’s bad news, especially if your cover letter has a lot of generalities, such as “In my last position, I excelled at the work and I am committed to working hard in this one as well.” That doesn’t say anything, unfortunately.

In the cover letter, lay out very succinctly why you are qualified for the job on all points. Lay out an orgy of evidence that not hiring you would be insanity, but be specific. Give examples from your past jobs. Personally, I don’t even mind bullet points because it makes it faster to get to the meat of the information. A warning, though, about bullet points: if you use them, do not just rewrite your resume in the cover letter. If you just list your education and work experience in your cover letter with little else, you might as well not even have one.

3. Make everything on your resume as applicable as possible

This is hard to do sometimes, but whenever possible, make everything on your resume applicable to the job you’re applying for. That might be hard if you are, say, a certified backhoe operator and you’re applying to be a chef. It doesn’t hurt to have unrelated jobs listed, but it doesn’t help you either, and you need every edge you can get. This is a chance to highlight your transferable skills. In the above example, delete all references to dirt-moving ability, and say something like “worked well under pressure.” It’s not super persuasive maybe, but it’s something.

“Works well within a time limit” [Source]

4. Make file names very clear, include your name in all of them

This is for applications where you need to attach a lot of documents. This maybe isn’t a deal breaker, but odd file names can cause confusion and you don’t want any negative feelings attached to you or your application. I recommend every file be a PDF with your full name, a hyphen (-) and what it is: either resume, cover letter, references, etc. PDFs are cleaner than Word documents and can’t be altered by anyone else.

Also, make sure the file name doesn’t say anything like Resumefinal.doc or coverletter-(company name).pdf or anything else. People know you are probably applying to tons of places, but it’s not good to remind them of that. Make a separate folder on your computer for every place you apply for so they don’t get mixed up (the worst thing you could do is send a letter to someone addressed to a different company), and so the resume and cover letter look like they’re your only one.

5. Use only English, don’t abbreviate place names people wouldn’t know

This is a minor one, but a pet peeve of mine. There should not be anything but English on the documents (unless, of course, you’re applying in another language, of course) except for names of places and people. If you do need to use words in other languages, make sure that they are transliterated into the English alphabet. It might make you look sophisticated to have Arabic or Chinese on your resume, but if the person doesn’t speak that language, it can only hurt you.

Also, do not use place name abbreviations outside your country. Everyone in Canada, for example, probably knows that ON means the province of Ontario, but if you are applying for a job outside of Canada, don’t use the abbreviation.

6. Be professional but don’t be scared to have some personality in your cover letter

This is probably the hardest line to walk. On one hand, this is a very formal process and not the best time for “’Sup guys, how about giving me a job over here?” Still, you don’t want to write a cover letter that sounds like it was written by a soulless robot, or even a soulful one.

The best approach, in my mind, is to avoid all slang and contractions to give it a formal feel, but use simple, conversational language and avoid buzzwords and jargon unless absolutely necessary. This will make it more readable and also come across as more natural, hopefully. It’s possible that the person going through your application may have to work with you if you are hired, and if they can get the impression that you would be great to work with, that can go a long way.

7. Don’t include a picture

This is just my opinion. It is pretty rare, but some people do include a picture of themselves. It may also be a cultural thing, where in some countries you might be expected to include a picture. However, it is not normal in the United States and to my mind, it can only hurt you. The best case scenario is that it won’t have any effect, but you want the people reviewing your application to judge you on your qualifications, not make snap judgments about your appearance. I was going to say that including your picture might be okay if you were extremely attractive, but even that could work against you if the person has some prejudice about beautiful people being less intelligent. You never know who will be looking at your application, so it’s a situation best just to avoid.

8. Do your research

It is amazing how many people know very little about the places they apply for. This could be seen as understandable if a person is putting out hundreds of applications, but I would argue it is better to put out half that number of good applications than just shooting them out blindly into the void.

There was a time when doing research on a potential employer was pretty difficult, but there is a lot less excuse nowadays where an Internet search can bring up a lot. I’m not saying that name-dropping the HR director will necessarily win you brownie points, but if you can mention some specifics about the employer that would be applicable to your job, that is very impressive, if only because it’s so rare. For example, you could say, “I noticed from photos on your company website that you use the HR400 series recombobulator. I did tech support on that line for two months so I would be comfortable operating them.”

As long as it’s actually true, that really helps you stand out from the crowd. Definitely don’t lie, especially about specifics. It’s too easy to catch that, and you will definitely not get the job if you are caught lying.

Again, these are just some things from my own personal experience and I cannot guarantee that all employers will think the same (I can guarantee they won’t, actually). However, I hope these tips help if you are looking for a job in the near future.

Do you have any other do or don’t tips for job searches that you’ve found to be true? Let me know in the comments.

5 Comments | tags: cover letter, job application, outside the tower, resume, tips for applying for jobs | posted in Uncategorized

July 4, 2016

Bunny & Crackerberry

By David Stewart

This is all true.

When I was young, I got a stuffed rabbit from a relative. For Christmas, I think, but I was too young to remember exactly when. I named it Bunny, since children have a very straightforward way of naming things.

It started out pink, but eventually was just pink-ish, since I carried it around everywhere. Through a thousand hugs and a thousand nights being gripped by a young kid as he slept, the pink all left, leaving only the –ish and Bunny has been –ish colored ever since.

Some animals come with a smile permanently pasted on their face. I have this little black bear that my sister gave me called Andre. He looks like he’s scowling if you see him straight on, but if you tip him up a little, you can see that he’s really grinning. Bunny, however, doesn’t have a smile. He may have at one time, but most of his mouth got worn off. Now it is more a look of longsuffering. He looks at you with his big eyes and small, worn out mouth, not smiling exactly, but always being there for you.

Those aren’t his original eyes, by the way. I chewed off his plastic eyes when I was young, so my mom sewed on new ones. I’m not sure how many sets he’s had, actually. I think he might have that expression for a reason.

Bunny also wears a little shirt made out of an old sock. It’s got little holes for his stubby arms but since it’s a sock, it’s always rolling up, revealing his belly. I spend half my childhood rolling it down and straightening it out. But, like that one cowlick in the back which is impervious to hairspray, gel, curses, and tearful invocations, it only takes a minute each time for that shirt to pop back up.

Bunny’s most distinctive feature is his neck. Originally, he had a normal neck, but the neck is the perfect place for a young child to hug a stuffed animal, and eventually his neck got all thin and stretched out, so it wouldn’t support his head any longer. He spends his days with his head permanently flopped over at a 30-degree angle, a longsuffering look on his –ish colored face.

You might think that Bunny has had a pretty rough life, and on some levels, you might be right, but he’s also had a pretty charmed life. After all, he has two lucky rabbit’s feet. I used to bring Bunny everywhere and we used to travel thousands of miles every summer to go visit family. Several times I left Bunny at hotels and relatives’ houses, but he always got shipped back to me, much to my relief.

Somewhere along the way, I got a stuffed dog named Crackerberry, which was good because that gave Bunny a friend. He was much more robust than Bunny and since he missed the terrors of toddlerdom that Bunny endured, Crackerberry has stood up much better over time. I used to sleep with the two of them pushed together, which was pretty much all that saved Bunny from totally disintegrating over the years.

For the last few decades, Bunny and Crackerberry have enjoyed a quiet retirement together at my parents’ house. Who knows if another generation will eventually play with them and love them, although Bunny might have gotten all the love he can handle for one lifetime and should probably sit the next generation out. Sometimes I think they might be lonely and sometimes I even wish I were young again and back in my little attic room with the two of them. But that’s life, and at least they have each other.

11 Comments | tags: bunny, crackerberry, outside the tower, stuffed animal, toys | posted in Uncategorized

July 1, 2016

My Life’s Dream

By David Stewart

dreams

(This is true.)

Not to sound too much like Donald Trump, but I have the best dreams. They’re fantastic, really. No one has dreams like me. Absolutely no one. Sad, really.

The problem is, I can rarely remember them when I wake up. I wake up knowing that I just had a fantastic dream, no idea what it was about.

However, there is one dream that I have had over and over again. For decades. It is one of the defining features of my life, although almost no one knows about it. Until now, of course. You are really privileged, dear reader. I just hope you realize that.

It’s more of a location than a specific dream, but I keep coming back to it and referencing it in dreams so often that it’s as real to me as, say, New York City. Actually, I’ve been to this place more often than I’ve been to New York City.

It’s a large warehouse or industrial complex, up on a hill with trees around it and reached by a long winding road. Sometimes it’s abandoned, sometimes not, but there are almost never any people there.

I first dreamed of this place when I was a teenager, I think. It was abandoned then, and I sneaked in and started digging in the floor. What I found was a large open space and then more space under that. There were man-made tunnels going out in all directions and further down and further down, it went, maybe forever.

Every dream is slightly different, but it’s always the same kind of place with empty tunnels and dark spaces going down and down out of knowledge. Just a few weeks ago, I dreamed that I was camping with my family and we drove past that place. I saw it up on the hill and knew it was the same place I’d been dreaming about for half my life. I wanted to bring them all up to show them the place, but we didn’t because dreams frustrate you just as much as they enthrall you.

Anyone who has read my (still unpublished) novels will be able to see this love of vast, dark spaces pretty easily. It is a theme that excites and fascinates me and make me feel that heartache longing, redolent of nostalgia and homesickness for a home I’ve never seen. I’m not sure why, but that’s me.

It’s why I love the work of H.P. Lovecraft or House of Leaves or Empire of the Ants. It’s why one of my favorite parts of Lord of the Rings is when they are in the mines of Moria. I am at home in huge, dark spaces. It’s what I dream about when my conscious mind takes a break and I let my subconscious out of its box, to play and plot. To dream.

The-House-house-of-leaves-692472_800_600

The House, from House of Leaves (Source)

5 Comments | tags: darkness, dream, Empire of the Ants, House of Leaves, Lord of the Rings, lovecraft, underground | posted in Uncategorized

June 20, 2016

Summer Writing Project – 170 prompts

By David Stewart

Hello, are you still out there? You might be wondering the same thing about me. I’m still alive, although I’ve had less time for blogging recently. I’m still writing, just in other areas.

Businessman Buried in Paperwork --- Image by © Royalty-Free/Corbis

This is why I love computers (Source)

However, I thought I’d try something different for the summer to get back into blogging and try some different kinds of writing. I’m a writing teacher, teaching students for whom English is a second language. Part of what I get them to do is create blogs and write about various things every week. At the moment, I have two students, and here are their blogs:

https://japaneseninjablog.wordpress.com/

https://writingclass2016.wordpress.com/

Sometimes I give them a specific prompt to write about, but sometimes I let them write about whatever they want. One thing I use is a list of 170 Journal Writing prompts I got from Daily Teaching Tools. So I decided to try it myself. For my class, I picked out 170, so I’m going to go through the list and see how far I can get.

Of course, I have to be me, so I’m going to do them my way. Most I will write as fiction, but some I will write from my point of view. If it is non-fiction, I will make that very clear.

Coming soon:

Prompt #1 “Write about going back to school after summer vacation.”

4 Comments | tags: summer, writing, writing prompt | posted in Uncategorized, Writing Prompts

June 2, 2016

Holi at Upper Iowa

By David Stewart

Some pictures from the Holi festival at our university a while ago.

Upper Iowa University

Exactly a month ago, Holi came to Upper Iowa. Holi is a Hindu spring festival, usually held in March and since we have a lot of Nepali students, this is our second year holding it. Our version is different in that it is much smaller, doesn’t have the original religious significance, and is held a month or so later. This is because Iowa in March is usually still too cold to be outside for a long time.

The main draw of Holi is the colors, specifically throwing colored powder at friends and strangers alike. It’s about having fun, and boy did the students (and staff) have fun.

multi-colored Venezuelans

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5 Comments | posted in Uncategorized

May 27, 2016

My Chipmunk Saga

By David Stewart

This is a true story. My office is in the basement of a converted house and it is surrounded by death traps. To be fair, they’re called window wells and nothing has actually died in them, that I know of, but it’s been close. Baby animals especially fall in there and can’t get out.

This afternoon, one of my coworkers came into my office and said there was a small chipmunk in the window well. We both work in the basement so it’s easy to see into the window wells. I never look into them, however, although she does. “It’s alive but it’s not moving much and it’s covered with flies.” Uh oh, that didn’t sound good. She thought it was a baby one. I went over and looked. It looked small, but all chipmunks are small, so I couldn’t tell if it was a baby or not. It looked dead to me and had flies on it, but she said she’d seen it moving. We figured it could have been down there for days without food or water.

picture-of-a-baby-chipmunk

I didn’t think it had much of a chance but I didn’t want a dead chipmunk in our window well and I wanted to at least try to save it. I went outside and climbed down into the window well, while she watched from inside. The little guy was definitely alive but barely. I scooped him up with a piece of bark and put him on the grass outside. He moved feebly, but couldn’t stand up. I went and got a paper plate with some water on it, although I thought he looked too weak to drink it.

So I left, not expecting him to survive, but not knowing what else to do. A little while later, my coworker came back and said, “He fell in again.”

chipmunk

Grumbling about suicidal chipmunks, I went back and looked out the window. There was a chipmunk in there but definitely not the same one. This one had lots of energy and was trying to jump up the molded ladder to get out, but he couldn’t quite make it.

The day was shaping up to be a reverse episode of Chip and Dale, Rescue Rangers, where I was the one rescuing the chipmunks. I went out and found that it had started to rain. The first chipmunk (let’s call him Chip) had crawled about three feet and was still lying on the grass, trembling and getting soaked by the rain. I picked him up with the paper plate and put him under some bushes to stay dry. Then I got a mop and angled it down into the window well so the other chipmunk (Dale) could climb up.

Now that it was raining, Chip probably had enough water, but needed food. “If only we had some nuts,” my coworker said. “I have some,” I said. I have a container of trail mix in my office to stave off mid-afternoon munchies, so I picked out some peanuts and raisins and carried them out and put them next to Chip. He got up immediately and tried to eat but his legs were shaking so hard he could barely stand. I looked down and saw that Dale was gone, so I assumed he had climbed up and brought the mop back inside.

I was just about to go home when my coworker mentioned that there was a chipmunk in the window well, yet again. I was tempted to let stupid chipmunks lie, but I went outside and looked in. Again, I couldn’t see anything. Then, as I climbed in to get a better look, I noticed that a section of siding was trembling. I lifted it up and there was Dale, hiding underneath it. Apparently, he had never climbed out, just hidden. I had a plastic garbage can and so for the next few minutes, I terrified the little guy by chasing him around the window well, trying to get him into the garbage can. I felt like a nurse running after a fleeing patient with needle, shouting, “It’s for your own good!”

Finally, Dale made a mistake and fell into the garbage can. Before he could jump out, I lifted it out of the window well and laid it on his side. A second later, he dashed out and was off to safety. He’s probably still telling his chipmunk buddies about how he evaded death at my hands.

Chip was gone, which I took for a good sign. About half the nuts and raisins were left and at first I felt this was bad, until I realized that, considering that a single peanut would make a good meal for a chipmunk, he had probably stuffed himself. So, hopefully he is off in some hole now, recuperating.

We really need to cover those window wells with nets or something.

I just want the best for you, Chip.

12 Comments | tags: Chip and Dale Rescue Rangers, chipmunk, nonfiction, office, rescue, work | posted in Uncategorized

April 4, 2016

Fenghuang – the chinese town that time forgot

By David Stewart

I would love to visit this city, or at the very least, build it in Minecraft.

e MORFES

Photo credit

Fenhuangis an old town in Hunan province, China, with a history spanning 1,300 years, and architecture dating back to the Ming and Qing dynasties. It is well-known for its stilt houses, folk culture, ethnic groups and fantastic landscape. The town is placed in a mountain setting, incorporating the natural flow of water into city layout. Fenghuang means Phoenix in Chinese language and it represents good omen and longevity in Chinese mythology.

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March 28, 2016

5 Things I Learned at the Fayette County Democratic Convention

By David Stewart

What do you usually do on Saturday morning? I usually sleep in slightly, then maybe go over to the coffee shop for a cup of coffee and a few hours of writing.

Not a few Saturdays ago though. Instead, I got up early and drove to the county courthouse, where I sat and listened to people talk for five hours. It was an interesting experience, however. It was the Fayette County Democratic Convention. Here are 5 things I learned there.

Fayette county

The caucus system is pretty messy

The caucus system has none of the clean-cut mechanistic feel of a secret ballot, where every vote is (supposedly) methodically counted. In the caucus system, it’s all out in the open, in a way that probably worked better a long time ago when there were less people. At the county convention they did get the Bernie Sanders delegates to sit on one side and the Hillary Clinton ones to sit on the other. However, there were observers mixed in with them, along with alternate delegates and no way to tell them apart unless they volunteered the information. True, all the delegates had hand-written name stickers on, which, to be fair, are pretty hard to fake without a trip to Dollar General.

Picking a presidential nominee is democratic-ish

Another thing that surprised me is that although none of the delegates changed sides, they technically could have. This means that although the results of the caucus were announced on February 1st, at any stage of the process, the delegates could decide to change their vote to anyone.

“Under the Democratic Party’s Rules, pledged delegates are not legally “bound” or required to vote according to their presidential preference on the first ballot at the Convention. Rather, these delegates are, pledged “in all good conscience [to] reflect the sentiments of those who elected them.” [Rule 12.J]” (Time.com)

This means that the higher you get as a delegate, the more power you have, and democracy transforms slowly into an oligarchy.

Some people get addicted to local politics

That kind of power, even at the district or state level, can be quite appealing, and there are people there that have gotten used to having it.

The caucus on February 1^st lasted about 2 hours maybe. The county convention was about 5 hours. One woman told us all about how the district one was at least 8 hours and the state convention could be even longer. She went on and on about how tiring it was, but then when it came time to elect the delegates, she was one of the first to volunteer. I’m not saying that what she said was untrue, but I wonder if she was trying to discourage people from volunteering so she could go.

I can understand it. Even at the county convention, there was a special feeling, like you were part of an elite group. That only increases as you go up the scale. It’s like being part of the in-crowd.

Our state senator telling us about troubles in Des Moines

You get to see what your neighbors think

What took the most time, just like at the caucus, was debating the party planks. At the caucus, people suggested things that they thought were important and we debated them and then voted on whether to send them on to the county convention.

At the county convention, we debated on those and decided whether to send them on to the district and state levels, which is why those conventions take so long. Some of the ideas, like increasing funding for mental health treatment and increasing the minimum wage were pretty normal. Then there the ones that clearly were important to a very specific group, like the resolution to get wild parsnip labeled as a noxious plant.

And then there were the other kind of idea…

People really don’t like Washington politicians

One of the first planks that was debated was whether to strip members of Congress of their pensions. One of the main arguments for this was that they’re all corrupt anyway and can engage in legalized insider trading, so they all leave office rich. This seemed cynical to me, and I voted against this idea, but in the end it passed overwhelmingly among the group there. Of course, I don’t think Congress will ever vote to take away their own pensions, but it shows the anger and general dissatisfaction people have with federal politicians when they are quite willing to strip high-level public servants of their pensions.

Another more radical idea that got floated was to make members of Congress work for minimum wage. I’m not sure how it got to the county level and it was voted down easily but it still shows how much people want to stick it the politicians. It is easy to see that sort of thing on the news, but it’s another thing to see it in person.