Tag Archives: chores

Division of Labor

There are three of us stuck in this cabin, locked up together until spring comes.

Raymond’s fat and lazy. Heaven help us, it’s his job to cook and keep the fire going. Liam is small, hard, and lazy. He cleans and does the laundry when I can convince him to go collect snow to melt for wash water.

My job is to keep the whole operation going and give the others a whack when they need it. They should thank Providence I lost my way in that blizzard and happened to stumble on their cabin. Otherwise, nothing would get done.

 

 


The Best Mother’s Day Ever

Happy Mother’s Day everyone. This is my bizarre tribute to mothers everywhere. For those of you who don’t know, this is part of a weekly photo prompt, where the challenge is to write a 200-word story based on a picture. Skip down below the picture for the story.

For my regular readers, I’m sure you’ve noticed I haven’t been posting much lately. I have been working hard to finish a manuscript of a novel so that’s taken most of my time. I just finished today, so I should be posting more from now on.

The Best Mother’s Day Ever

“Happy Mother’s Day, honey. I got you something really special!”

“What is it?” Debbie asked, taking the box from her husband Robert’s hands and opening it.

“It’s a gun,” he said. “You shoot yourself with it.” Seeing her look of horror, he continued quickly. “No, no, it doesn’t hurt. You know how you never have enough time to do everything you need to? This gun helps you split up your body so you can do more things at once. Great, eh?”

“Uh huh, I see. How does it work?”

“You just point it at a body part and fire and it detaches. You can still use the body part and control it though. You shoot it again to reattach it. Imagine how efficient you can be now.”

“Sounds great,” she said brightly, and shot him.

Twenty minutes later, Debbie was sitting on the couch, eating an ice cream sundae and watching a movie. Robert’s left arm was cleaning out the gutters; his right arm and legs were out picking up the dry-cleaning; his head was watching the kids; and his torso was mowing the lawn, somehow.

She smiled. This was the best Mother’s Day ever.

 

 


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