Tag Archives: woman

Fantastic Travelogue #6 – Enough of This

Sometimes you have some amazing adventures you just have to tell everyone about. Read the rest of this account here.

 

There are times in life when something happens that changes everything. Like if you’re arguing with someone and they pull a gun out, or if you’re in a restaurant and find a mouse in your food. They’re kind of deal-breakers. That’s what it was like when I saw that map, which apparently showed where I was, yet was nowhere that I recognized.

That’s it, I’m done, I thought. I wanted to get some air. I wrote the word “air” (空氣) on the paper, but the woman didn’t seem to understand what I meant. So I just stood up and walked out. She came too, of course.

I had no idea what time it was, but it must have been pretty late. The moon had set and the sky was dark. One door of the gate had been shut, but the other was open a crack. I walked around a little, as if admiring the architecture, and then when I got close to the gate, I just took off running. The old woman shouted after me, but I was already through the gate when the two guards wheeled out of the darkness towards me. They lowered their spears to block my way, but I was too fast for them and a second later, I was running and stumbling back up the valley.

It was exhilarating to break social convention that way and just run away. Once when I was in Korean city with my cousin, a man came up to us and wanted to guide us around. Nothing we said could make him leave and eventually we ran away as he was getting a taxi for us all. It was that same feeling, a mixture of adrenaline and relief, spiked with the fear of being followed.

I left the path to avoid being caught again and started blundering blindly through the underbrush. That place may not have been in Korea, but it sure had the same amount of thorns on every living thing. My jacket was torn and my hands were scratched and bleeding before I had gone very far.

I was out there a long time, maybe hours. All I know was the sky was just beginning to lighten in the east when I came out of the woods and found a tall fortress wall in front of me. I didn’t see the gate anywhere. I had left the path on the left side, and so I now continued left along the wall. My plan was to walk around the fortress and then back up the valley where I had come from.

I was really tired by this time. I hadn’t slept all night and the last time I had eaten was when I was locked up in the room in the fortress. I kept stopping to lean against the wall and close my eyes. Maybe twenty minutes later, I came to what Koreans call an ammun, or secret gate, built into the wall. The tiny door was open and all I could see inside was darkness. I was about move on, when a lantern was uncovered and a woman stepped out of the gate.

I was about to run, when I saw that it was young woman I had seen earlier the day before; the same one who had helped to lock me up. Still, she beckoned me in and smiled so joyfully, that my legs moved on their own and followed her inside.

Just inside the gate was a small chamber, probably designed for guards. There was food and water there, as well as a bed. I had a drink of water, but before I knew it, my eyes were closing and I couldn’t keep them open. The girl saw this and helped me lie down on the bed and covered me with a blanket. Within a minute, I had drifted off to sleep.

I know I usually draw pictures, but I didn't have time this week. This is a secret gate close to what it looked like.

I know I usually draw pictures, but I didn’t have time this week. This is a secret gate close to what it looked like.


Fantastic Travelogue #5 – Inside the Golden Dome…sigh

Sometimes you have some amazing adventures you just have to tell everyone about. Read the rest of this account here.

 

Have you ever done something that you knew was a bad idea and then as soon as you did it, you realized it was a very, very bad idea? That was how I felt as I stood in front of the stone circle in the clearing, with the strange woman in animal skins and a purple veil smiling creepily at me. I must have been mesmerized, since I sure wouldn’t have gone out there on my own. Even my adventurous spirit was whimpering in the corner, asking for mommy.

The woman walked to the edge of the stone disk and stepped delicately off. As she did, the soft glow that enveloped it faded. A few of the women took out lanterns and held them up as the woman walked towards me. We were about the same height—over six foot—which was rather intimidating. She said something to me and when I didn’t respond, she something else in what seemed like a different language. She went through almost a dozen languages, and all of them sounded foreign to me.

“I’m sorry,” I said finally, in English and Korean. “I don’t understand.” I gave her a sheepish smile and shrugged.

She burst out laughing and then shrugged her own shoulders. She kept saying things and shrugging her shoulders as if it were a huge joke. I was starting to blush with embarrassment and the other women were looking distraught and studiously avoiding looking at her.

The woman stopped and barked a few orders at the women. Then she linked her arm through mine and we all started walking back down towards the fortress village.

Seriously, what would you have done? I would have given quite a large amount of money not to have been in that situation, but I felt trapped. There seemed no way of escape, short of punching and pushing them all out of the way. So, I let myself be led along, just a big, dumb lamb to the slaughter.

We reached the fortress town but to my surprise, the women didn’t stop. The fortress gate was open and we went right through and continued down the valley. I looked around for the pretty young woman I had met that afternoon—not that I liked her or anything, I just wanted to see a familiar face. She was nowhere to be seen though.

The woman kept looking over at me and smiling and saying stuff, as if she expected me to understand.

I don’t understand you at all, Your Royal Battiness! I thought. I admit, it wasn’t very clever, but I was desperately trying to cope with the situation. Unfortunately, calling her that made me smile, and she thought I was smiling at her.

The next twenty minutes were an ordeal of awkwardness I’m going to pass over quickly. She thought I understood a little of what she was saying and kept speaking slower and louder. I would have gladly gnawed my own arm off to get away.

Just when I was seriously considering punching her and making a break for it, the forest path opened out into a wide clearing and the tower with the golden dome loomed up in front of us. It was surrounded by a low wall topped with torches. The flickering torchlight glinted off the golden dome, making all kinds of effects with light and shadow.

The Golden Dome

The gate was open and guarded by women with spears. We went into a room with a low table in the middle and surrounded by lamps, so that it was fully lit. The woman sat down on one side of the table and motioned for me to sit opposite her. I decided to try to communicate: the old woman in the forest had understood Chinese characters, so it was possible this woman would too. I traced out my Korean name in Chinese characters on the table and I could see instantly that the woman knew what I was doing. She barked a few more orders and pretty soon a woman came in with paper, a brush and an inkstone. I’d never written with a brush before, but I did my best and wrote my name again (大成).

“Di-sheng?” she said. My Korean name is Dae-Sung, so close enough. I nodded. She grabbed the brush and started to write quickly, which I couldn’t read at all. After a few minutes, she caught on and wrote it all again, very meticulously. I didn’t recognize it all, but I saw the word for “come” (來) and the one for “place” (場) so I figured she was asking where I was from. I’m from Canada, but I don’t know how to write that in Chinese characters, so I just wrote “America” (美國).

“Mai-gog?” she said and burst out laughing. She was really getting on my nerves. She pointed at me and said, “Mai-nan” and then pointed to where I had written America. I didn’t get it until she wrote down some more, but when I did, it didn’t make me feel any better. “America” in Chinese characters literally means “beautiful land” and she was saying that I was from there since I was a handsome man. Evidently she didn’t believe such a place existed and thought I was just playing with her. I wished my wife was there. She wouldn’t have had any problem punching a creepy old woman who was hitting on me. I, on the other hand, was too much of a wuss gentleman.

After she got over the hilarity that is the word “America”, she gave a few more orders to the attending women and they brought in a map. I could tell that she wanted me to point out where I was from. She pointed to one place and I realized it was our current location. It even had a tiny picture of the dome.

The problem was, it wasn’t a map of Korea. It wasn’t even a historical, rough approximation of Korea. I don’t know where it was, but I got a sinking feeling as I stared at it that, all the same, I was there.


Seriously, Stay Away from Strange Women – Fantastic Travelogue #4

Sometimes you have some amazing adventures you just have to tell everyone about. Read the rest of this account here.

I just wanted to go home and I was determined more than anything to try. It was becoming a human rights issue, keeping me locked up like that for no reason. I pounded on the door a few more times and then stood next to it, waiting. Sure enough, the door opened a crack and I stuck my foot in it and pushed it open wide. I couldn’t tell in the dark which woman it was in front of me but I pushed past her and I was free.

Actually, I was in the hallway. Here, there was a bit more light from a lamp burning on the wall. The woman behind me let out a cry and started saying something really fast. Another woman, a young one, appeared at the end of the hall, blocking my path. She held out her hands and seemed to be pleading for me to stop.

I don’t know what she was thinking as I—a huge, bearded foreigner—bore down on her. I was running on adrenaline and I hip-checked her out of the way and dove through the open door. I almost blush to think about it now. I’ve never pushed a woman before, except maybe my sister when we were young, but I was frantic and just wanted to get out of there.

The streets outside were deserted, although another woman was sitting on the landing by the door where I came out. She was older and didn’t get up when I came out, although she shrieked at me something awful. I ignored her and ran down the road, heading back up the valley towards the trees where I had come from. Forget cool experiences; I was done.

The bright light was still visible through the trees, although the loud screaming sound had stopped and the ball lightning was all gone, thank goodness. I still figured it was a concert or something going on up there and I pushed my way through the trees and underbrush, trying to go around the clearing with the stone circle. If they were as crazy as the women I had met, they’d just grab me and put me back in the room. I wasn’t going back; I was sure of that.

I got close to the clearing and the light became so strong I could pick my way through the bushes as if it were daylight. I got to the far edge of the clearing and looked back.

Strange Meeting

It wasn’t a concert. There was a group of women standing in a semi-circle, close to the stone circle, but not too close. The whole stone circle was bathed in a brilliant pale light that shot up in the sky like a searchlight, although I couldn’t tell where the light was coming from. The stone itself, I guess. On the stone circle was a woman. She looked about middle-aged and was wearing what looked like animal skins and a shimmering purple veil that framed her face and fell down the front of her dress.

I was just about to move on and make a break for the mountain pass when the woman looked directly at me. It was weird, but for a moment I forgot about going up the valley and found myself walking towards her, out into the clearing. The assembled women noticed me before too long and I heard a few gasps that sounded like terror. That didn’t make me feel any better. The woman kept looking at me and smiled.

This is an adventure? part of me said, trying to reassure the rest of me.

I’m an idiot, the rest of me said, as I kept walking.


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