I figured that this picture would inspire a lot of heart-warming tales (although we do get a lot of variety in the group). In any case, I decided to go in a slightly different direction…
You can Bait a Fool with Water…
“Careful.” (Nervous girlfriend.)
“Don’t worry; it’s got a blindfold on. It can’t see us.” (Cocky boyfriend.)
Just a little closer. (Horse looking at two oblivious humans through the fly-mask.)
“Hey, it’s doing a trick! It’s holding the hose in its mouth.” (Boyfriend, gawking.)
Water splashes on electric fence, splashes on cocky boyfriend. Sizzling, sparking, collapsing, convulsing. Girlfriend runs to help.
More sparking, collapsing, convulsing.
She couldn’t help. Two unconscious humans.
Fall, my dainties, fall. (Horse smiles.)
Snaky tongue emerges from horse’s mouth, dragging unconscious humans under the fence.
Body ripples, teeth and claws grow.
Horse no more.
March 20th, 2013 at 7:12 pm
Damn shape-shifters. You just can’t trust them. Nice unexpected twist at the end. Good job! Thanks for being first to comment on mine. No awards or that…just my gratitude. 😉
March 20th, 2013 at 7:20 pm
No problem! Thanks for being first to comment on mine. 🙂
I usually check for your post with the prompt later in the evening (our time) but this time I checked it about 4:30 and so got in early. First time at #2, I think. It was pretty hard for me this time. I had to really think about what to write.
March 20th, 2013 at 7:34 pm
Aliens are among us!
March 20th, 2013 at 7:36 pm
Maybe aliens, or maybe horses are all like that. My memories of the Mr. Ed show are a bit fuzzy.
March 20th, 2013 at 7:41 pm
I love this, particularly the description of how they die; very show-y not tell-y 🙂
March 20th, 2013 at 11:08 pm
Thank you. I wanted to try a different style of writing this time; very immediate and visceral.
March 20th, 2013 at 8:04 pm
You’ve made the ordinary horse look so dangerous..this was very good
March 20th, 2013 at 11:08 pm
Yeah, I feel bad for the poor thing. I’m sure some other people’s stories will be gentler to it.
March 20th, 2013 at 8:14 pm
March 20th, 2013 at 11:09 pm
March 20th, 2013 at 8:17 pm
Glad the horse got the final word
Excellent in the dark and creepy catagory
March 20th, 2013 at 8:29 pm
Mystic would love this story. I know I do. And if he could’ve thought of it, he would’ve done it….the electrocute the humans bit…just for a whinny.
March 20th, 2013 at 11:11 pm
Thanks, Doug. It’s all about the whinnies. 🙂
Great picture, by the way. Is this a horse you know, or just a random one?
March 20th, 2013 at 9:00 pm
I love it!
March 20th, 2013 at 10:53 pm
March 20th, 2013 at 10:54 pm
I mean that in the best possible sense of the word, of course! 🙂
March 20th, 2013 at 11:13 pm
Of course. 🙂 Definitely not my choice for dinner.
March 20th, 2013 at 11:29 pm
oooh a tricky little horse indeed! Great imagination. Fun read
March 20th, 2013 at 11:35 pm
David, I love this! It’s just like the Spanish Inquisition–unexpected! It may be the Holy Grail of humor this week. Kudos.
March 20th, 2013 at 11:36 pm
Forgot to mention that your title is both hilarious and perfect.
That’s it. 🙂
March 21st, 2013 at 12:12 am
Well, no one expects the Spanish Inquisition, or diabolical horses, I guess. Glad you liked it. 🙂
March 21st, 2013 at 3:28 am
Oh man, i may never trust a horse again. But then i guess I should determine when i started trusting them to begin with. Ummm…I never really have. A nice little imagination you have there Dave.
March 21st, 2013 at 8:53 am
Don’t trust horses bearing gifts of water, I guess.
March 21st, 2013 at 3:47 am
How great is this! I’m intrigued and laughing at the same time, just too cool for words! 🙂
March 21st, 2013 at 4:10 am
A were-horse for sure 🙂
March 21st, 2013 at 8:41 am
Very crafty, David. Nice!
March 21st, 2013 at 8:48 am
oh my gosh. for someone who does not like this genre as a general rule, I think this is just too cool. great job here. I could hear the horse/shape-shifter’s maniacal laugh as he rubbed his hands/feet/paws together.
March 21st, 2013 at 8:57 am
Thank you. 🙂 He’s quite a devious one.
March 21st, 2013 at 1:20 pm
Great! Scary, too! Really enjoyed it.
March 21st, 2013 at 2:59 pm
Unsuspecting humans fall prey to…. what?
How am I ever to feel safe again…???
March 21st, 2013 at 4:58 pm
I’m not sure exactly what it is. I’ll let you figure out what it is and take solace in the fact it’s not real. 🙂
March 21st, 2013 at 3:21 pm
ok that was scary! and a little gross. lol amazing how you turned this image of an innocent-looking horse into something dark. well done ^^
March 21st, 2013 at 3:41 pm
haha.. liked the different direction on the picture ! nice one ! 🙂
March 21st, 2013 at 4:40 pm
I love it when there’s a totally different take on the prompt. Good twist, nicely done.
March 21st, 2013 at 8:59 pm
Wait a minute, I don’t think that’s a regular common-or-garden horse at all! I like the way this story builds.
March 21st, 2013 at 9:02 pm
Thanks. 🙂 I hope it’s not a normal horse, or the word ‘equestrian’ takes on a sinister connotation.
March 21st, 2013 at 9:56 pm
I like the way that the horse started out as a clever, cheeky horse and then became a murdering horse, then a shape-shifter at the end; three twists. Great stuff.
March 21st, 2013 at 10:34 pm
A bit macabre, but certainly a unique take on the photo prompt.
March 21st, 2013 at 10:46 pm
Thanks for reading and commenting~
I’m sure it’s not everyone’s kind of story, but I like to try a wide variety of genres for these 100-word stories.
March 21st, 2013 at 10:48 pm
Oh man. So horrific. I’m never going near a horse again. I may have nightmares tonight…
March 21st, 2013 at 10:51 pm
D’oh, I hope not. 🙂 Anyway, best to stick with dogs. Just never read “Cugo”…
March 22nd, 2013 at 1:58 am
Dark and eerie. A vicious creature that pretended to be a horse. Nicely done. 🙂
March 22nd, 2013 at 4:33 am
What a charming little tale!
March 22nd, 2013 at 12:51 pm
Well – I never expected that. It took me by surprise!
March 22nd, 2013 at 4:47 pm
this was downright scary! what an imagination! its one of your best shots I think.
March 22nd, 2013 at 5:15 pm
Psychotic shape-shifting man-eating horse? Why didn’t I think of that?
March 22nd, 2013 at 5:52 pm
What a fun story — I really enjoyed it. And a neat use of parentheses for adding just a little more on the side.
March 22nd, 2013 at 11:35 pm
Very good! Which is not surprising. 🙂
March 23rd, 2013 at 1:14 am
Great surprise at the end. It certainly wasn’t a feel-good horse tale. I wonder how many other people have disappeared in the same way….
March 23rd, 2013 at 1:21 am
Love it!! Dastardly horse
March 23rd, 2013 at 9:09 am
You just never know, do you? 🙂
March 24th, 2013 at 9:37 am
You set out to be different and I would say you probably achieved that!
March 24th, 2013 at 4:20 pm
March 26th, 2013 at 11:14 pm
Chomp, chomp, belch. What a tasty treat this story was. Well done, David.
March 28th, 2013 at 1:33 am
Fun story David! I love the part about electrocuting…You have a twisted mind!
March 28th, 2013 at 8:43 am
It is a little twisted, yes. 🙂
January 28th, 2014 at 10:01 am
[…] in terms of a slightly more legitimate accomplishment, one of my stories, You Can Bait a Fool with Water was accepted to the Were-Traveler’s online magazine. Go check it and other spooky stories out […]
April 26th, 2015 at 12:04 am
[…] His father was reading a blog story. He pointed to the screen. “Well, it could always be worse.” […]