Dear speed bumps,
I hate you. I hate the fact that you have shaken my poor little motorcycle to bits by having to continuously drive over you and worn down my brakes by constantly having to slow down to not totally kill my front wheel.
Almost all speed bumps in Korea are painted with this pattern.
I hate the fact that you seem to spawn mostly in the countryside (in Korea, at least), where the open road beckons and the Killjoy McGee that you are keeps getting in the way.
I hate your fake-out cousins, the lines that are painted on the roads to make it look like a speed bump is there. That’s a lie and nobody likes a liar.
Look at it: just paint but no bump. What a liar.
I especially hate your brother, the ninja speed bump that doesn’t have any lines so that it blends in. I hit those full-on and almost go flying.
In conclusion, you slow me down unnecessarily, you damage my bike, and you cause people to die.
Please go away forever,
-David
